Website link

This is not weightloss related but can you all (all 3 of you!) go and check out my friends new craft website here. Many thanks…

I must…

I have updated my blog look again. Having trouble with my widgets admin page though so doesn’t look too fab just yet. Hopefully will all be sorted soon though.

Was doing good then got depressed again and put a few pounds on. Back on diet tomorrow though and hopefully will have some damage limitation for weigh in on Wednesday. Must just get on with it.

Went out at the weekend, was mental as usual.

Still not back in the gym, must do that this week. I have been exercising more though. Must drink more water and eat less bread.

I must lose weight. Period.

Seven Pounds Down

I really should update more often, I am sorry! This past week has been very busy though. Because I couldn’t go out on Saturday, I ended up going out Friday, then a flame from the recent past turned up that night too. I ended up going out Sunday too, and then on Tuesday I went to a Beck gig and last night (Wednesday) I ended up over town again! I didn’t drink last night though, I thought I should save my liver.

I have started to make sure I get out and about every day in the sunshine and that has really helped my mood. Dramas with The Boy are not helping me to stay too focused and happy at the moment but I am trying really hard anyway! My appitite has reduced significantly.

I had my first weigh in with wwonline yesterday and had lost 3lbs. This morning I am down another pound. But from my highest weight in recent times of 15.2, I am now 14.9 so that is a loss of 7lbs, or half a stone.

Not Great

Hello everyone. Just wanted to say hi and say I have not forgotten about groovybabe or my weightloss. The reason I have been awol all week is I have been really ill. At the tail end of last weekend I developed a urinary tract infection and it really doesn’t want to go away. At first I was diagnosed with thrush and sent away with cream, then the next day I was back and it was a urine infection and was sent away with antibiotic. When 3 days later the pain was still not subsiding I went to the out of hours clinic and they changed my antibiotics. I am now on day 2 of them and there doesnt seem to be any let up of the pain still so I am going to have to go back again tomorrow I think and change my meds again.

I just want to be better. I have been having so much pain passing urine for a week now, it is like passing razor blades. I did also have a fever, blotchy eye sight, felt like I was going to faint and was weeing pure blood at one point. That has all gone now thankfully but I am somehow resistant to the meds and the infection does not want to clear up.

I went out last night, mainly because I’d been in all week and was going mad, but didn’t drink. It was my first weekend off from drinking in maybe 6 months. It feels good this morning not to feel like death warmed up! But the night was rubbish without drink. Even the DJ shouted over the tannoy that I am not the same on water!! But to be fair to myself, I think it is more because I am worn down from the pain of this infection than any ill-effect water-only has on me. Anyway, I ended up coming home at 1am because I was just not feeling the night.

Weightloss this week has been a bit of a bugger. I havent been paying attention at all. I just weighed myself (tomorrow is my official weigh in) and I am 201/14.5, which is what I was at my last weigh in, so being ill has not done me any great good weightloss wise…

Oh, in case you would like to hear more from groovybabe in her day to day life, I have started a blog up called ‘groovybabe: life’ its hosted over at my old groovybabe site on wordpress, which you can find here. Please add it to your feeds.

Not So Bad For Us

I am sitting here with a glass of water revelling, nay, basking in the glory that I have the loss of weight under control again. I woke up to another pound down today – 14.6, or 202lbs. I am so happy with this. My stomach is so much flatter but I think that is in part because I came on yesterday. I am so excited for the time when I have lost enough that it becomes noticable. I think the first time around it was at about 20lbs loss but hopefully as I have less to lose now it will be more dramatic sooner. Maybe wishful thinking, though!

This time starting dieting is such a different experience for me. I was morbidly obese, very alone, agoraphobic, living at my mums in a very stressful situation and having about 20 panic attacks a day. If I can manage to lose weight in that environment then frankly there is loads of hope for me now. I live in my own place, don’t have panic attacks or agoraphobia, have a very hectic weekend social life and am only just classed as ‘obese’ (3bmi away from overweight) and I have lots of friends. There is no reason whatsoever for me not to manage it now. Weightloss is not easy, as we all know, and it is a complete battle of the mind, but we also know how rewarding the results can be. THIS is what excites me.

For the record, not that this matters to me one way or the other but is good to have a record of, I am not using Xenical this time. This weightloss is completely natural. I mean it was natural last time, it bugs me when people assume it is not because of the pills, but you just have a helping hand kicking your habits into place. Critics of weightloss pills say the weight will all go back on afterwards or you’ll always rely on the tablets or you don’t learn proper eating habits and while I would agree this is the case with Reductil (which I did try once), it certainly is not the case with Xenical. Xenical is ALL about teaching good eating habits. But even so I am not going to use it just because I can. It was there and very beneficial to me at a time when all other avenues had failed me. I am not in the desperate situation now that I was in then and in some ways that will make weightloss harder but in other ways, easier.

Some people struggle to exercise when trying to lose weight and that holds them back but with me it is food I struggle with. I love food. I am a ganit. I am not fussy, will eat almost anything and in large portions too. Portion size has been the struggler for me. But cutting out bad foods too. Cheese, bread, ice cream, cakes, crisps, chocolate… you name it! I do find it easier to cut out than have in moderation though, and I feel healthier too. So this slightly unorthodox article by Amanda Ursell informing us of bad-foods-that-can-be-good really caught my eye. She tells us the nutritional benefits of red meat, white bread, kebabs, ice cream and butter! Articles like this should come with a warning to be taken with care. It’s all good knowing these can occassionally be ‘not so bad’ for us, but I do worry that some people will take the article literally and use it as an excuse to live on those foods, which would obviously not be sound health advice. But if you read between the lines, Amanda does make this very clear. Personally, I like the idea of ice cream for dessert every night (I actually started losing weight doing this last year!) and do eat red meat for the iron, but I am going to steer clear of white bread I think…

It Points Out My Fat

I am 4lbs down since Monday. I can see it in my face. I feel much better for eating right, inside. I feel in control. There are so many positives from doing this. I am really proud of myself for managing to do it this week of all weeks because my life has been dramas ahoy (just for a change) and I have at all times stuck rigidly to my weightloss plan. This tells me this time I am going to do it again. I am quite excited by this. I can’t wait to start getting comments from the people in my life who only know me at this weight. I can’t wait to hit the ever elusive 13 stone era (although that will be a few weeks away yet)…

You know what I am really looking forward to? When I hit the 12 stone era because I do not consider that to be fat, just overweight. Hopefully others will not consider it to be fat too. It’s also going to be easier to reap the health benefits of weightloss now I weigh less to. After all it will take less pounds to reach a ten per cent drop…

I bought a jean skirt yesterday. It’s the first one I have owned for maybe ten years. I bought a size 16 because that is what I am, but I somehow convinced myself that there was no way it would fit me because I am kidding myself if I think I am a size 16. But of course it fitted me, because I AM a size 16 (UK, remember). However, it was quite tight fitting and while I think it is passable in the day time I would not feel confident enough going out on the pull in it. It points out my fat, or at least I feel like it does. So I guess I am back to the drawing board about tomorrow night.

Talking of tomorrow night, I am giving up beer again. I am going back to sticking to diet coke and vodka. It didn’t do me any harm in the past and will help me to lose weight.

(Oh can I also point out to those of you who have misunderstood – xenical is NOT an appitite suppressant. It blocks 30% of the absorption of fat from being digested into your body, meaning your body turns to the fat stores you already have quicker to burn off, that is all.)

Confidence

I widgetized my sidebar and it messed up the background and looked funny and I couldn’t work out how to fix it so I have taken off my colourful background image. :’( At least it looks clean, I guess.

I went out last night and have vague memories of tequila shots and am feeling rather delicate so the fact that I am writing in here today now is testiment to just how serious I am about wanting to get back on track with losing.

I weighed myself just now and am still 14.9. It is starting to fustrate me a little bit now. I always always lose weight after a big night but I haven’t this week. Probably something to do with the lovely big burger I ate last night (before I went out) but it was delicious! I didn’t dance last night really so did not burn off calories but I did end up walking across the city at 4am on my own to get to my mums house because I lost my friends and had no money on me. I know! I was very scared but luckily nothing happened to me. Actually I ran for a quite a while too. W00t.

When I lost all that weight I felt so confident, I was untouchable. I really felt on top of the world. But the last few months I have started dating again and due to bad choices (when will I learn!?) my confidence has slowly been eroding. It hasn’t helped that due to boy-stress I ended up putting 10lbs on so when I looked in the mirror lately and could visably see those 10lbs around my waistline, my confidence has plummeted further. The last few weeks I have got my mojo back, and my sense of equilibrium, so I have slowly been re-gaining control of what I eat. But the thoughts I have when I look in the mirror these last few days are quite worrying. I haven’t felt this bad about myself (well, my look) since I weighed 19 stone. I really don’t know what I can do about it other than to start losing weight again (don’t bother telling me weightloss on its own won’t bring confidence – it does!) so I need to get really serious about this. REALLY SERIOUS.

Here are my intentions:

• Stick to 1600 calories, or less.
• Do NOT eat during the night. Ever.
• Drink 2-3 litres of fluids every day.
• Some form of exercise every day.
• Gym 3x a week.
• Weigh myself daily.
• Write in my blog daily.
• Keep my food diary updated.

I am also going to the doctors tomorrow for a blood test. I have been feeling wiped out for weeks now and it is not only intefering with my exercise plan but my life in general. I don’t think it can be anything too serious as I have not had it affect my weight but I think it is a good idea to get these things checked out.

More Successful

I ate really badly last night throughout the night but when I woke up this morning I felt nauseous, I had the pre-sick water thing in my mouth, so I didn’t eat a thing until 2pm. I have just logged up my calories on this fantastic new site: www.mynetdiary.com and it has come up at 1600 calories. I also did an hour of walking today as well, so if I manage to not have a midnight binge, I should stay on track with weightloss.

I think I will be alright about not binging tonight. I seem to have begun to lose my appitite today. I guess that is down to feeling sick. I hope I am not feeling wiped out tomorrow and that I can enjoy a workout. Have decided that if my health is still affecting me come Monday I will go have some blood tests (its the panic anxiety sufferer in me worrying – I dont suffer now but the thought processes are still nagging at me).

In non-health related news, this morning I was locked in my apartment! I went to open the Yale lock and the door was jammed. I tried everything to open it and was about to ring the landlord to come out and sort it out when my Daddy arrived randomly and managed to fiddle it open! Phew!

I have updated the site again, it is very colourful. I still need to play around with it and touch it up, and sort out the sidebar but it looks different!

Mix Up

Current Weight: 14.0 stones
Yesterday’s Weight: 14.3 stones
Yesterday’s WW Points on track? Yes
Exercise Taken Yesterday: None
Challenge Points: 4

I am back to putting this information at the top of the post because when I was doing that last time it really helped me to stay on track and lose weight. So you can see from this information that yesterday I had a good day of staying on track. It was my first such day in many weeks. I find it so hard to keep the motivation when I havent been doing it for a while but I maintain it is a lot to do with the chemicals from bad foods that make it so uncontrollable. I woke up yesterday after my night out on Saturday and just decided that would be the day I get back on track. Instead of gorging on bad foods to nurse my hangover, which I have been doing lately, I decided to cook up a treat in the way of a home made vegetable soup. It was lovely and curbed my need for bad foods and binging. Lately I have had a real problem with eating through the night (because I don’t sleep well) and last night was the first night I did not feel the need to do that, despite being up until 4am, so there has to be a connection between eating bad foods and wanting to gorge in the night. It is all good though.

You may wonder what the “challenge points” are? Well Betz and I have been talking about setting up a new challenge to help re-motivate us into weightloss. Rather than go for who can lose the most weight, we thought we would offer points for good behaviour, and then the person with the most points at, say, the end of the month is the winner. If you would like to get involved with this then leave a comment and I will update your results every week (on a Monday). Here is how you get points:

• Staying on track with food (either on points or under 1500 calories) – 3 points
• Full workout at the gym – 3 points (half arsed one, 1 point)
• 5 fruit and veg – 1 point
• 2litres of water – 1 point
• 30 minutes of exercise – 1 point (you cant count this into your gym workout to get more points, this is exercise other than a gym workout)

If I can think of other things to add for points then I will, if you have any ideas then let me know, but these are the basic stay healthy-stay on track incentives. I will do a weekly update, but the overall winner will be monthly.

I have changed my layout back to my original one. This is psychological in the main part. I was doing really really well when I had this layout. So I am hoping by putting it back up it will bring me success again. Plus it is pretty.

Today is also weigh in day. Last week I weighed in at 14.0 stones (196lbs) but over the next four days I was gorging through the night uncontrollably as I hinted at above, and by Thursday weighed in at 14.9!!! Saturday I weighed in at 14.3 and today I have weighed in at my lowest weight again of 14.0, so while I havent officially lost on my weekly weigh in, it is a huge success that I managed to regain control again and not end up two stone heavier. I am really looking forward to being in the 13’s now, like you cannot imagine. And it is going to happen in the next few days!!

Weigh In 17/02/2008

I weighed in today at 14.1 – down from 14.2 two weeks ago. I did weigh in at 14.0 yesterday but that was probably dehydration from drinking the night before. I am close to the 13’s now, I can smell them.

This weekend the problems that arose last weekend were rectified so depression is not an issue now and I feel more capable of getting on with the loss of weight. I did intend on going to the gym today but a 2-day hangover has sort of scarpered that idea, LOL. Will go tomorrow.

It is the school holidays now so I have taken the chance to stop buying bread this week. I eat far too much of it, I am possessed almost in the face of a sandwich. So no school lunches to prepare this week means we can do without it in the house. I have gone 3 days already and attribute this to my weightloss this week (I was 14.6 a few days ago). I eat far less when I don’t eat bread.

I need to find a new activity in my life. I would like to do something active. I think I may take up swimming. I have been saying it for ages now, but I really must just go and do it. I think I will take my son later in the week. Yes. Yes, I will.